ELEMENTAL

I rise to meet the waiting shore, I hear the voices from the sea, Their echoes growing more and more, It’s overwhelming me. I flow like waves onto the land, Every voice dissolves in me, I touch the shore and feel the sand, Until my tide turns quietly. Below the surface I awake, To drift into a lucid dream, A quiet breath I finally take, Returning to my hidden stream. It wraps around me, safe and deep, A place so familiar and so true, A sacred space I get to keep, Where I slowly can renew. I touch the sand, and I retreat. I touch the sand, and I retreat. Once more I meet the waiting shore, The distant voices welcome me, I will continue to explore, As far as my eyes can see. The current shifts beneath my feet, It pulls me back to deeper ground, I feel the need to retreat, floating where rest can be found. I touch the sand, and I retreat. I touch the sand, and I retreat. No tide can rise without retreat, I need that stillness in my core, To gather what the waves deplete, Before I rise again to meet the shore. I touch the sand, and I retreat.

I'm standing still in the eye of the storm, Without motion, feeling, or sound. There's no way in, no way out, Thoughts keep circling around. The storm is raging around in my head, I seek peace in the midst of this fight, But every thought crashes into the next, And nothing inside me feels right. Everything is slipping away, My hands feel empty and weak, And for a moment I'm no longer sure, Is this the peace that I seek? I'm standing still in the eye of the storm, Without motion, feeling, or sound. There's no way in, no way out, Thoughts keep circling around. I walk to the edge of the storm, The whole world passes me by, Without being able to grasp it, I look at the darkening sky. I could stay here forever, And watch everything disappear, But then I wouldn't be truly alive, Then I'd give in to the fear. I'm standing still in the eye of the storm, Without motion, feeling, or sound. I know there's a way in and out, While thoughts keep circling around. I'm standing still in the eye of the storm, Without motion, feeling, or sound. I know there's a way in and out, While thoughts keep circling around.

Blazing sparks, Fall down. Smoldering and searching, For more. Devastating. Mutilating. There's nothing left, Of what was before. Dark Skies, Descend. Raging and smoking, All day. Devastating. Decimating. I don't know, How to find my way. The fire within destroys it all... I'm consumed by fear of losing control. I call for help, I scream and I shout. Don't let me fall, Pull me out. Stinking and smoldering, I can't explain. Losing my way, Wading through ash. Devastating. Humiliating. Amazed and bewildered, By all that has passed. I sit down at dawn, I look at what's left. Of my so-called existence, Through the fire-rain. Devastating. Isolating. Alone and abandoned, I feel the pain. The fire within destroyed it all... Consumed by fear, I lost control. I called for help, I screamed out loud: "Don't let me fall", But no one pulled me out. So I rise from the ashes, Like a phoenix of fire. I use my last strength, To shape my desire. Like a phoenix, from the shadows, Breaking through, Ash and flame. Not unbroken. Yet outspoken. I return... But not the same.

I look at my hands... I remember it all, While you erase me, I ask myself, where did we fall? I walk to the store... No one sees me break, But inside my head, The ground starts to shake. Coffee spilled. Hold my breath. Tension builds... The cracks burst open, I sit down and cry. Emotions overflow. Erased... But I don't know why. I open your drawer, It's empty... I doubt... What is real? I no longer know what is true... You just wiped me out! I pour us some coffee, Then thunder strikes through my head, There is no longer an us! There is still so much left unsaid. But you closed the door, Just erased me from sight. As if there was nothing before. The cracks burst open, I sit down and cry. Emotions overflow. Erased... But I don't know why. Did I matter to you? Or was it an illusion I chased? Was it ever real? When I was so easily erased. The cracks burst open, I sit down and cry. Emotions overflow. Erased... But I'll never know why.

Up to my ankles in the sand, It feels safe and warm, But inside my restless head, Hides a raging storm. The ocean calls my name, The waves gently sing my song, The foam drifts to the shore, But why does all that feel wrong? The ocean doesn’t know how to cry... I tell the ocean who I am, And wait for its reply, It echoes my own voice, But never tells me why. The ocean doesn’t know how to cry... Every footprint I leave behind, Disappears into the sand, As if I were never there, Drifting away again... Tell me who I am. Tell me where to go. Tell me how to feel. Tell me what to know. The ocean doesn’t know how to cry... I tell the ocean what I need, And wait for its reply, It only echoes my own voice, But never tells me why. The ocean doesn’t know how to cry how to cry... cry... (cry)

I was built for the sea, But the wind touches my sails. It pulls at my ropes, And rattles my rails. The wind awakens a longing, Of which I was not aware. Should I surrender... Do I really dare? Up, up, up... Into the sky… I have to go, I don’t know why. Made for the waves, Called by the wind. Bound by design, But never pinned. Free by choice... Free by choice... In a brave moment I take the leap, I rise slowly from the sea. The wind gently caresses my hull, It lifts me up and carries me. My heavy hull feels strangely light, The water kept me in its sway. Now I am carried by the air, I gently drift away... Up, up, up... Into the sky… I have to go, I don’t know why. Made for the waves, Called by the wind. Bound by design, But never pinned. Free by choice... Free by choice... When I fall, I fall so deep, Back into the ocean's sway. I fear the relapse all the more, Now I know there is another way. Made for the waves, Called by the wind. Bound by design, But never pinned. Free by choice... Free by choice...

Deep inside, a little flame, Its presence soft and small. It flickers and it burns... It lives inside without a name, Like a signal on the wall. The flame within, grows big and strong, When passion fills my soul. It stirs things up and blazes... Fuels my mind, sparks my drive, It makes me feel that I am whole. Spark to flame... Flame to ember... That little flame inside of me, It burns there quietly. Then it suddenly flares up, It's always there... A part of me. When I'm depressed and overwhelmed, The little flame is there. It burns low, but fairly strong... I cherish it between both hands, So as not to fall into oblivion. The passion rises with the flame, Stirs endless realms within. It expands and it withdraws... To rest and wait anew, Hidden beneath my skin. Spark to flame... Flame to ember... That little flame inside of me, It burns there quietly. Then it suddenly flares up, It's always there... A part of me.

I'm walking through the woods, I lean my back against a tree, Rustling leaves above my head, Casting their spell on me. I feel the solid trunk behind my back, The branches stand out against the sky, The tree stands firmly in the ground, It nearly makes me cry. Deeply rooted.... Cradled by the earth. I am sitting on the ground, I see dead leaves, I smell the dirt. I just want to be cradled... To be cradled by the earth. I touch the old leaves lying there, I smell the wet earth, smell the mold, Press my hands firmly to the ground, Until I feel its steady hold. I am the dirt, I am the tree. The branches open over me. The earth becomes my anchor, I rest beneath the canopy. I am sitting on the ground. It's not just dead leaves and dirt. I feel cradled... I feel cradled by the earth. I feel cradled by the earth.